Bro-versations

My older brother and I text a fair amount. I mean, not a crazy lot, but more than the average bear. We're not in the thousands of texts per month category. Yet. But, it'd be weird to go a day without sending a few messages back and forth. Part of the reason why we text so much is that I find him totally hilarious. I'm not sure what he's getting out of the deal, but me? I'm enjoying myself. For instance, I give you the following two exchanges. I think I might post some of these sort of regularly, not least because they are awesome. But also, my phone can only hold, like, 12 texts so having them here will lighten the electronic load while keeping them in remembrance. I'll try to avoid ones that involve complex, acronym-riddled inside jokes.


Me: I just had a Little Debbies Snack Cake for breakfast. Because I am a champion.
Bro: Did u wash it down w/ a cold beer?
Me: Actually, used the leftover diet coke from mcd's yesterday.
Bro: Nice! Isn't it cold in just wife-beater though?

And just from yesterday:

Me: Surely pitas are not beyond the limit of a reasonable grocery store? Why do you not carry them fresh market?
Bro: Hahahah. U r such an eltist! Just have meat and spuds!!
Me: Am making lentils and potats in coco milk...i am not helping my case am I?
Bro: Hahaah. Is your beret color coordinated w/ bowtie?
Me: Please. Am wearing a top hat. Obviously.
Bro: And tails?
Me: Tails are out this season.

Ideal morningscape


Every morning since late December, I wake up to this:



This image (thanks, mediocre camera and bad photo skills!) doesn't really do it justice. But it's got these lovely textures to it, including the white, which is soft and flannelly. Just like repentance should be. Wait, what? you're saying, repentance? Yep. It's a version of the Wordless Book. And also one of the best Christmas gifts I've ever gotten.

Thanks, friend!



Wearing my personality on my collar

On Saturday, I bought six more bow ties. Six! This brings my total up to 32. Which means, even on the longest month, I could wear one a day without a repeat. Of course, I have yet to reach the magical 52, which would make it possible to wear a different one every Sunday (though, since there are two Sundays that are conference and at least two more that are freebies, i.e. Stake Conference, maybe I only need to hit 48?).


I love bow ties. Not only does it blow mind of other people that I could master the knot, they also allow a handy shortcut into understanding my personality. For instance, just since Friday, people have pointed to my wearing of a bow tie to indicate the following:
  • I must be Mormon
  • I have bad taste
  • I have aspirations to academia
  • I am a pretentious jerk
For this last one, all it took was my friend to make the claim and then stare meaningfully at my bow tie when asked what would give him that impression. It's so convenient that I can broadcast these things about myself nonverbally. It saves everybody so much time. And don't worry if you're about to connect me and bow ties and some other trait. It's all true.